Bird Words From the Herd – A Transcript of Tweets re: Deadspin and Te’o’s Dead-Spin

Below is a roughly chronological listing of the more humorous/trenchant of the tweets as the Deadspin story broke, and ND held an “explanatory” press conference (See the original Deadspin story here):

Jason Gay ‏@jasonWSJ
Wild RT@Deadspin: Manti Te’o’s dead girlfriend, the most heartbreaking story of college football season, is a hoax.
Jim Roberts ‏@nytjim
RT @michaelhayes: When Manti Te’o tweeted about his two guardian angels
This brought tears to my eyes! The two beams of light! My guardian angels!!! I miss you!!  (Instagram of MT tweet
Dan Wolken ‏@DanWolken
RT @HeismanPundit: Jim Rome asked Te’o about his GF: “What was she like?” Te’o: “I can’t describe her.”
Dieter Kurtenbach ‏@dkurtenbach
Te’o says he found out Dec. 26, but on Jan. 3, he did nothing to debunk a question about “her” death. I was there.
Gil Brandt ‏@Gil_Brandt
I had never seen a guy w/ Manti ‘s talent play as poorly as he did in title game. Events of today might explain it.
John Walters ‏@jdubs88
If I ever get back into print journalism, I’m bringing a challenge flag to all pressers and intvws.

netw3rk ‏@netw3rk
This is what happens when you name schools after ladies who tell people they got pregnant without having sex.
Retweeted by Bruce Arthur
Teddy Greenstein ‏@TeddyGreenstein
Altho he’s not applying for sainthood, either. RT @BTNTomDienhart: I am even happier now that my Heisman vote went to Johnny Football.
George Dohrmann ‏@georgedohrmann
@Deadspin reminds us all that if a person/story is too good to be true, it probably isn’t true. See: Lance Armstrong, Joe Paterno, Manti Teo
Adam Weinstein ‏@AdamWeinstein
Between Manti Teo, the NRA & “Return of Kings,” this hairy-chested myth-making party’s really taken a turn for the douche.
Ken Jennings ‏@KenJennings
WHOA. I am no longer the most famous Mormon to invent an always-suspiciously-absent “girlfriend” in college.
Amy Davidson ‏@tnyCloseRead
Key phrase in @Deadspin story: “It was around this time that Te’o’s Heisman campaign began in earnest”
Dave Zirin ‏@EdgeofSports
Only the culture of misogyny in Notre Dame football can explain this repulsive Manti Te’o/fake dead girlfriend story.
Jon Solomon ‏@jonsol
I’ve read this multiple times and I’m still stunned. RT @Deadspin: Manti Te’o’s dead girlfriend is a hoax.

Dan Shanoff ‏@danshanoff
This Te’o thing is the most gobsmacking sports story I have read in a long time:  Kudos to @bubbaprog and@jackdickey.
Josh Levin ‏@josh_levin
Does this mean Brian’s Song was fake too? No? [Cries again.]
John Walters ‏@jdubs88
The question, if Deadspin got it right, is what did ND’s SID staff know. Know these guys well. Don’t believe for a moment they’d b complicit
JALEN ROSE ‏@JalenRose
Whoa. Manti Te’o of Notre Dame made up the tragic story about his GF dying? #Insane
P. Schrager ‏@PSchrags
Manti Te’o CATFISH’D all of us.
Brooke Jarvis ‏@brookejarvis
RT @katz: The Deadspin piece on Manti Te’o has racked up 232,000+ views in 50 minutes.
Jon Solomon ‏@jonsol
OK. RT @McMurphyESPN Notre Dame: “ND coaches informed Dec 26 by Manti Te’o & parents Manti had been victim of what appears to be a hoax”
Pete Thamel ‏@SIPeteThamel
ND: “Lennay Kekua apparently ingratiated herself with Manti and then conspired with others to lead him to believe she had tragically died.
John Walters ‏@jdubs88
Lennay Kekua to be the next coach at Oregon.
John Walters ‏@jdubs88
It’s a GREAT point by @ChrisRRegan Bama’s QB dates Katherine Webb and Notre Dame’s All-American stud dates a charade.
Chris Regan ‏@ChrisRRegan
Even though she never existed, Brent Musberger is horny for Manti Te’o dead girlfriend.
lindsayeanet ‏@lindsayeanet
Manti Te’o stuff is nuts but still wish people were as shocked & outraged by ND sweeping Lizzy Seeberg under the rug as they were about this
Johnny Manziel ‏@JManziel2
Just so people know the media doesn’t always paint the correct picture.. They just care about getting a good story and nothing else matters
Erik Malinowski ‏@erikmal
Rightfully so. RT @daveweigel: Feels like half the journalism world stopped what it was doing to WTF at this Deadspin piece for a while

edsbs ‏@edsbs
The weirdest bit: the bit in the Eric Hansen article about Te’o vacationing with the lady. The one. Who didn’t exist.
Gerry Callahan ‏@GerryCallahan
John Edwards on Te’o: I can’t believe people voted for him for the Heisman. #suckers
John Walters ‏@jdubs88
If you know this on Dec. 26, you know what day you inform the media? (I’ll pause as you mull it over). That’s right: Dec. 26.
Jason Belzer ‏@JasonBelzer
Clearly Te’o was in on it. If she never existed, he never spoke to her. No 21 year male gets duped by a virtual girlfriend for over a year.
John Green ‏@realjohngreen
In light of the Manti Te’o story, I’m just going to level with you guys: Most of my girlfriends between 1987 and 1992 were fictional.
Brian Hamilton ‏@ChiTribHamilton
The problem with that: What about the anecdote that Manti Te’o and Lennay Kekua met, exchanged numbers on the field at Stanford in 2009?
Emma Span ‏@emmaspan
Anxious to get home and make sure my boyfriend is real.
Pete Thamel ‏@SIPeteThamel
The big question here is whether Te’o was involved or not. Notre Dame is staking a loud claim that he got duped and had no involvement.
Bruce Arthur ‏@bruce_arthur
So according to that Notre Dame statement, Manti Te’o is claiming he was the victim of a hoax? Good luck with all that.
Dennis and Callahan ‏@DandCShow
I don’t know why everyone’s so upset about Te’o. I’ve had imaginary girlfriends most of my adult life.
Jason Belzer ‏@JasonBelzer
Would kill to see 6pm @SportsCenter lead off with Katherine Webb debating Rudy Ruettiger on the existence of Teo’s girlfriend.
Matt Norlander ‏@MattNorlander
Holy crap, Prisco. RT @PriscoCBS: Win one for the Fibber
Gerry Callahan ‏@GerryCallahan
Johnny Football and AJ McCarron: Their girlfriends are real, right? So confused right now.
George Zornick ‏@gzornick
How can Te’o claim he was the victim of a hoax?! He was in love with a girl he never actually met?
John Walters ‏@jdubs88
On the other hand, this is a typical relationship for a male ND student: We never really met or had sex.

John Infante ‏@John_Infante
No. RT @KevinOnCFB: Is there any NCAA issue with a school and player sitting on hoax news for weeks leading up to BCS championship game?
John Walters ‏@jdubs88
AP sports bulletin to staff: “Please, when talking 2 players about dead loved ones, inquire as to whether you might see a death certificate”
Keith Silva ‏@keithjs
.@EmmMacfarlane @kady @InklessPW Such a compelling story. Lots of guys will be hugging their fake girlfriends a little tighter tonight.
Bruce Arthur ‏@bruce_arthur
Weird that a Catholic institution would cover something up
Dave Zirin ‏@EdgeofSports
We can make Manti Te’o jokes, but there is a stunning disregard for women’s lives that pulses in the Notre Dame locker room.
Jim Tankersley ‏@jimtankersley
I am reassured by the non-existence of a Stanford student who would date a Notre Dame football player.
Longreads ‏@longreads
“The Most Heartbreaking And Inspirational Story Of The College Football Season, Is A Hoax.” @bubbaprog & @jackdickey
Philip Bump ‏@pbump
100,000 people are on that Deadspin story right now. That’s astonishing.
Jason McIntyre ‏@TheBigLead
Manti claimed to have met her. He claimed vacationed with her, per another story. What did he say to ND when it asked these questions???
Paul Zeise ‏@PaulZeise
Manti Te’o waving his finger and looking presidential “I did not have sex with that woman…”
wwilson ‏@brewonsouthu
@jdubs88 Notre Dame SID also lets slip that “there may have actually been only Three Horsemen”
Brody Logan ‏@BrodyLogan
Say what you want about Miami, but at least those hookers were real.
Matt Crossman ‏@MattCrossmanSN
Oprah should totallly bump Lance from tomorrow’s show for Manti.

Sarah Ball ‏@SarahBallVF
Guys, here’s the “tell” of lady existence: if we say “yes, please attend my burial” or “nah, two interceptions and some roses’ll be fine”
Jason Belzer ‏@JasonBelzer
Would have been a disaster for UND if this broke before national title game MT: @Ruknighttime Notre Dame knew about this on DEC 26!!!
Russ Bengtson ‏@russbengtson
All I want to know is whether Mante Te’o’s imaginary cancer patient girlfriend wore a LIVESTRONG band.
Yost ‏@MZoneBlog
BREAKING: Lance Armstrong personally thanks Manti Te’o for taking the spotlight off him for a few hours
Jeff Duncan ‏@JeffDuncanTP
Exactly… RT @StevePoliti: Still trying figure out a polite way to phrase the question, “So this dead girlfriend of yours — she for real?”
Bruce Arthur ‏@bruce_arthur
Takes something to author the biggest lie in college foorball

Matt Hayes ‏@Matt_HayesSN
Te’o cried right in front of me. Now it’s all a hoax. What in this world coming to? Column soon @sportingnews
Jay ‏@mgoblue1982
@MZoneBlog Te’o will get OJ to help him find the real girlfriend.
Retweeted by Yost
Chris Burke ‏@ChrisBurke_SI
Te’o in that Rome interview: “I can’t describe her. She was my best friend whom I fell in love with.”
Yost ‏@MZoneBlog
Notre Dame is going to have to change that line in its fight song from “Wake up the echoes” to “Make up the echoes”
Larry Sabato ‏@LarrySabato
First Lance, now T’eo. Hey Oprah, you’ve got a whole new career hearing confessions from lying sports stars!
Jeff Lind ‏@jefflind
Let those of you that haven’t made up a fake twitter-girlfriend and killed her off cast the first stones. #MantiTeo
Fred Kerber ‏@FredKerber
What’s the proper etiquette for sending imaginary flowers to a make-believe funeral for a phoney dead girlfriend?

darren rovell ‏@darrenrovell
Reminding today’s youth that someone who you have never met can never, ever be called your girlfriend.
Dave Zirin ‏@EdgeofSports
Just listened to audio interviews of Te’o’s voice cracking talking about GF. Either he was victim of profound hoax or he’s a sociopath.
morgan ‏@jarg0naut
@bruce_arthur I’m from Hawaii and I can confirm it doesn’t not exist.

Ben Jones ‏@Ben_Jones88
So after ND says they found out about the hoax, Manti Te’o was still talking about her: …
Philip Bump ‏@pbump
Wait. This guy is really saying someone fooled him into thinking she was his dying girlfriend? Thought that was a joke.

Greg A. Bedard ‏@GregABedard
Lol. Yes RT @realfreemancbs: NFL scout on Manti Catfish: “Won’t hurt draft stock. We draft guys that rob banks.” So, there’s that.

Richard Deitsch ‏@richarddeitsch
I learned today on Twitter that someone I’ve never met can never be called my girlfriend. #socloseto300khecantasteit

John Walters ‏@jdubs88
Musburger: “Oh, you middle linebackers, you get all the imaginary women!” Herbie: “Wow!”

Andrew Brandt ‏@adbrandt
Te’o is working out in Florida with dozens of other Draft prospects. I’d imagine the training table will be a bit lively tonight…

Seth Meyers ‏@sethmeyers21
These Te’o jokes are all very funny but let’s all try and remember that a person who never existed is dead.

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Back when she was a prostitute and we were innocent RT@bruce_arthur: Remember when Suzy Favor Hamilton was the strangest story of the year?

kevin corke ‏@kevincorke
MANTI TE’O: Please, if you’re in on this, admit it, apologize and move on. The cover up is ALWAYS worse than the crime. #te‘o #manti#hoax

Jason Kint ‏@jason_kint
I’m so confused. The @nytimes cited the tragic story of T’eo’s girlfriend no less than 4 times & Notre Dame never bothered to let them know?
B. David Ridpath ‏@drridpath
You are already dying Swarbrick!

Bruce Feldman ‏@BFeldmanCBS
Notre Dame AD Swarbrick: Manti was the victim of a hoax. In many ways, he was the perfect mark.

Erik Malinowski ‏@erikmal
Notre Dame AD Jack Swarbrick: “I can assure you, no one knows all the dimensions of this.”

Bruce Feldman ‏@BFeldmanCBS
RT @ChiTribHamilton Apparently the call-in number for #NotreDamepress conference with Jack Swarbrick also a hoax, as it does not work

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
On Jan. 16, the “strangest story of the year” contest is over. Unless Te’o story gets weirder. Which it could.

Bruce Feldman ‏@BFeldmanCBS
ND AD Swabrick: On Dec 26, Manti called ND coaches after being called from cell # of what he thought was deceased GF & it was her voice.

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Swarbrick just affixed himself to the Good Ship Te’o. When this thing goes down, Swarbrick, we’ll remember.

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Swarbrick: “Nothing I’ve learned has shaken my faith in Manti Te’o one iota.” Doyel: C’mon, man.

Erik Malinowski ‏@erikmal
Is Jack Swarbrick real?

edsbs ‏@edsbs
what am i even watching

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Am now live-tweeting a press conference about a famous player’s fictitious dead girlfriend. Never saw this day coming
Ben Jones ‏@Ben_Jones88
Notre Dame is cosigning this pretty hard aren’t they? ‏@Rivals
RT @NDatRivals: Swarbrick: “Te’o received a call while at the ESPN awards dinner from number assoc. w/ Kekua, caller said she was not dead.”

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Swarbrick just backed Te’o into a corner. If he comes clean, he brings down AD. Irish better hide Brian Kelly.

darren rovell ‏@darrenrovell
I am very surprised that Notre Dame AD Jack Swarbrick is willing to put the university behind Te’o here.

David Steele ‏@David_C_Steele
For the AD’s and school’s sake, this story had better check out. They’re in it neck deep now.

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Needed this laugh RT @RattoCSN: The Mayans were right, just not on the date. THIS STORY is the end of the world.

Mark Schlabach ‏@Mark_Schlabach
Never thought I’d hear ND AD Jack Swarbrick utter the words: Catfish and catfishing, references to the art of Internet hoaxes

Joe Schad ‏@schadjoe
Jack Swarbrick cites movie “Catfish” that follows same plot as alleged Te’o scam.

Bruce Arthur ‏@bruce_arthur
I had never heard of catfishing

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
This press conference is turning my stomach.

Erik Malinowski ‏@erikmal
This is the greatest press conference in the history of humanity.

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Notre Dame giving more lip service to this fiction than to Lizzy Seeberg or Declan Sullivan. Where was the AD then?
Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
“It does fully line up,” Swarbrick says of Te’o’s story. This guy is running Notre Dame athletics

Brett McMurphy ‏@McMurphyESPN
Swarbrick said Manti had several inperson meetings set up w/girlfriend in Hawaii, but “she never showed”

darren rovell ‏@darrenrovell
Swarbrick is a smart guy. He surely knows that if he’s wrong about this, he no longer will have a job.

Bruce Feldman ‏@BFeldmanCBS
Asked about stories of Te’o GF visiting him & family in HA, ND AD Swarbrick says “this was an exclusively an online relationship”

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
“Exclusively an online relationship,” Swarbrick says, ignoring story in his hometown newspaper about Te’o meeting her

edsbs ‏@edsbs
college fuckin’ football ‏@Rivals
RT @NDatRivals: #NotreDame AD Jack Swarbrick: “I’ll tell you, this was exclusively an online relationship.”

Andrew Brandt ‏@adbrandt
Essence of Notre Dame statement: “Don’t blame Manti. Blame Catfish.”

Brian Hamilton ‏@ChiTribHamilton
#NotreDame AD Jack Swarbrick: “Very sophisticated hoax perpetrated for reasons we can’t understand but had a certain cruelty at its core”

Brian Hamilton ‏@ChiTribHamilton
#NotreDame AD Jack Swarbrick: “Every single thing about this, until that day in first week of December, was real to Manti.”

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Swarbrick: “Very vigorous discussion internally about what we do.” Not this press conference, Jack. Not this.

Ray Ratto ‏@RattoCSN
This is what covering sports in a parallel universe must be like

Ryan Abraham ‏@insidetroy
Someone has to ask why they did a pregame feature before the BCS Championship game on Manti’s dead g/f when they knew it was fake.

Mark Schlabach ‏@Mark_Schlabach
According to Swarbrick, multiple characters involved in hoax, both male and female, in elaborate catfishing scheme

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Manti would have admitted this story weeks ago, but “wanted to talk to his parents. That’s Manti. That’s who he is.”
Erik Malinowski ‏@erikmal
“We were very conscious of the fact that we didn’t know what we didn’t know.” Jack Swarbrick is just having fun now.

Steve Politi ‏@StevePoliti
You can put me in an institution if you want, but … right now, I believe Notre Dame and Manti Te’o.

Michigan Football ‏@UMGoBlog
Wow this sounds like quite an investigation. Lizzy Seeberg deserved one this thorough. Guess if she played football..

mike freeman ‏@realfreemancbs
Jack Swarbrick is making a fool of himself. He’s that Warner Bros. cartoon character whose head becomes a lollipop.

Brian Hamilton ‏@ChiTribHamilton
#NotreDame AD Jack Swarbrick: “The pain was real, the grief was real, the affection was real. That’s the nature of this sad, cruel game.” ‏@Rivals
RT @NDatRivals: #NotreDame AD Jack Swarbrick says the university will not publish the findings of the investigative report.
Judy Battista ‏@judybattista
I think I do, too. RT @StevePoliti: You can put me in an institution if you want, but … right now, I believe Notre Dame and Manti Te’o.I

Dave Zirin ‏@EdgeofSports
Swarbrick is a reminder that the problem at Notre Dame is not just football players without a compass, it’s the adults without a conscience.

Manti Te’o — Fake GF Called Me AFTER Her Supposed Death
Ben Jones ‏@Ben_Jones88
But I thought they just said… RT @BlkSportsOnline: Te’o on ESPN right now old interview saying “She is the most beautiful girl I EVER MET”
Gerry Callahan ‏@GerryCallahan
Screw it. I don’t believe the frigging grandmother died either.
Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
“The single most trusting human being I’ve ever met will never be able to trust again in his life.” COME ON MAN.
Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Swarbrick starting to cry. “The thing I’m most sad about is …” (crying)

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Greg Couch just asked about the face to face meeting at Stanford! And Swarbrick passed the buck to Te’o. But then says, “met” means online
Bruce Feldman ‏@BFeldmanCBS
Notre Dame AD Jack Swarbrick now crying on Manti Te’o presser.
Marc Isenberg ‏@marcisenberg
Hunter Thompson wrote, “When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.” Te’o’s silver lining, I suppose.
Cecil Hurt ‏@CecilHurt
If Manti Te’o was duped by this, can we all agree not to tell him about professional wrestling? ‏@Rivals
RT @NDatRivals #NotreDame AD Jack Swarbrick says the university did not refer it to the NCAA enforcement wing or law enforcement.

Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
You’ve heard the term, “winning the press conference,” right? Jack Swarbrick just lost that one.
John U. Bacon ‏@Johnubacon
To quote Lily Tomlin: “No matter how cynical you get, you just can’t keep up.”
Gregg Doyel ‏@GreggDoyelCBS
Swarbrick simply will not acknowledge that Te’o told THE SOUTH BEND PAPER he touched her hand after a game.
darren rovell ‏@darrenrovell
Wow RT @TheeDosEquisGuy He met Manti Teo’o’s girlfriend.

Michigan Football ‏@UMGoBlog
RT @PeterBurnsRadio What we learned today? Notre Dame will hire Private Investigators for Catfish stories, but not sexual assault cases.
Albert Breer ‏@AlbertBreer
Yup. He’s staking a lot on Manti’s word. RT @bomani_jones ALL IN, BRUH. swarbick is ALL IN.
P. Schrager ‏@PSchrags
Great question from Greg Couch. Swarbrick evades. Ummm…What about that touching face to face meeting after Stanford game?
Dave Zirin ‏@EdgeofSports
Sick “@tyleradkinsKSR1: Swarbirck’s first reaction was as a father? Too bad that wasn’t his reaction when he found out about Lizzy Seeberg”
Bruce Arthur ‏@bruce_arthur
One takeaway from all this: I’m glad I’m not on the dating scene these days
LaMichael James ‏@LaMichaelJames
I mean I’m not the smartest person and def not great at Math but this ain’t adding up at all hmm
Richard Deitsch ‏@richarddeitsch
That is one of the most remarkable press conferences we’ve ever had in sports
Sarah Mervosh ‏@smervosh
SWARBRICK: An investigative firm was engaged to determine what happened. Swarbrick shared findings with Te’o family on Jan. 5.
Darren Heitner ‏@DarrenHeitner
Virtual hand? RT @DVNJr “Their stares got pleasantly tangled, then Te’o extended his hand to the stranger..” …

Nev Schulman ‏@NevSchulman
I am working on finding out more about this @MTeo_5 #Catfish story. I have been in contact with the woman involved and will get the truth.
Bob Ley ‏@BobLeyESPN
NOT saying it went down BUT IF hoaxsters knew ND’s top def plyr went into BCS title gm w this scandal about to break, y not run to Vegas?
Adam J. Morris ‏@lonestarball
Its fascinating that a girl killing herself after getting raped by a player doesn’t faze Swarbrick, but Teo’s fake g.f. brings him to tears.

About brewonsouthu

lawyer, with interest in college sports and NCAA oversight and decisions, and sports generally.
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1 Response to Bird Words From the Herd – A Transcript of Tweets re: Deadspin and Te’o’s Dead-Spin

  1. This has got to be the most “unreal” thing I have ever read…..crazy!

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